43.Drunken Humor
Wife:Dear,you looked quite drunk last night and you kept repeating the same thing at the table.
44.Whose Fault Is It?
When a man came back home from shopping,he found his wallet stolen.His wife was hurling blames on him.
"Why did you go out at the rush hour/"
"Why did you take a bus?"
"Why were you so careless about your wallet?"
"Why did you take so much money with you?"
"Why..."
This time she was interrupted by her husband
"Why are you hailing blames on me instead of on thethief?"the man retorted.
45.Benefit From The Second Job
During their honeymoon,the bride said to the bridegroom,
"The fortune-teller was marvelous when he told me that my marriage would start within one mile southeast from here.It so happened that I met you at your factory gate."
The bridegroom said,
"There is nothing marvelous,The fortune-teller is my father.In his second job,he has introduced three girls to me in the same way."
46.Is This a Real Certificate?
Xiao Li is notorious for deceiving customers with imitations of world-famous shoes,jackets ornaments and other numerable articles.Quite a number of his victim went to the market inspection office to complain about his cheating behavior.
One day when Xiao Li was selling goods of poor quality ,a market inspector went to stop his business and took him into custody.Xiao Li looked at the certificate paper for a few minutes and asked,"Is the certificate real?"
47.Nail A Lie
I'm in charge of a medical office,and I've heard every excuse in the book about why patients are overdue with their payments.One of the best came from a woman who explained,"I'm sorry I'm late,but everything we had was destroyed in a tornado." www.qpx6.com
I asked if the number I was calling was her home phone.There was a moment's hesitation before she replied,
"Yes--and the phone is all we have left."
48.Positive Analogy
I had a terrible time learning how to drive.In fact,I failed my fist driving test.Sensing how bad I felt,The examiner offered a few words of encouragement."Don't think of it as failing,"he said."Think of it as increasing your life-span."
49.Likes and Dislikes
The first week after my six-year-old son came back from school,I asked him what he liked and disliked at school.He said,
"Oh,I like the sportsground,the swimming pool,the football field,the video room and the club,I have only one dislike--the classroom."
50.Busy with Appointments
Two friends meet in the street when the following conversation takes place.
Jane:"I haven't seen you recently.What are you busy at?"
Mary:"Well,you know,I have so many appointments with my doctor these days."
Jane:"What's wrong with you?"
Marry:"Nothing wrong with me physically.The doctor is my fiancée."
51.It's a great Pity
Before singing,a famous actor from Taiwan was asking the audience in his hometown,
"Have you heard my singing before?"
When he received a mixture of responses,he remarked,
"It's a great pity that you haven't heard my singing,but it's an even great pity once you have heard my singing."
52.Keep Secret
A distinguished clergyman and the elders from his congregation attended an out-of-town meeting that did not finish until rather late.They decided to have something to eat before going home,but unfortunately the only spot open was a seedy bar-and-grill with a questionable reputation. www.qpx6.com
After being served,one of the elders asked the clergyman to say grace."I'd rather not,"the clergyman said,"I don't want Him to know I'm here."
53.The Plane Crashed
Nast is a black athlete from Africa,He was the world champion for men's 100 meters' butterfly swimming.But in the Barcelona Olympic Games he captured only a bronze medal.When he was interviewed by a reporter,he said,
"During the match,the spectators all shouted joy and encouragement at me:"Mr.Plane,cheer up!"But unfortunately,the plane crashed tonight."
54.Why is the Groom in Black
While attending a Chinese wedding ceremony,Margaret's little daughter was interested in the bride and whispered to her mother.
"Mom,why is the Chinese bride dressed in red?"
"Because in China red is the color of happiness,"the mother explained."And today is the happiest day of her life."
After a moment's thought,she asked her mother another question,
"Then,why is the groom in black?"
55.D o Come in,Please
Gavin is a handsome young man,and his wife is a nurse,She is often out on night duty in the hospital.One midnight their next-door neighbor Jason was badly ill and his wife Karen went to knock at Gavin's door to ask his wife Jean for an injection.
"Who is it?"Gavin asked when he heard the knock at the door.
"It's me,Karen.Is your wife in?my husband needs her now."Karen pleaded.
"No,she is out now.Do come in,please."
56.No Chance in the Daytime
My sister asked her husband,"Why do you always talk in your sleep?"To this he replied,"Because I've got little chance to talk when I'm awake."
The next day when my sister asked her husband,"Why did you scold me in your sleep last night?"To this he replied,"Because I've got no courage to do so when I'm awake." www.qpx6.com
57.Natural Beauty
A young couple were window-shopping when the young wife stopped her husband.
"Dear,let's have a look at a new brand of lip-stick."When they found the high price of the lip-stick,the man said,"Dear,in fact,I prefer you the natural beauty without any make-up."
Then they passed a clothing department,the wife said,"I was going to get a dress,but I wonder if you insist on the necessity of my natural beauty."
58.Which Woman?
One evening I drove my husband's car to the shopping mall.On my return,I noticed how dusty the outside of his car was and cleared it up a bit.When I finally entered the house,I called out."The woman who loves you the most in the world just cleaned your headlights and windshield."
My husband looked up and said,"Mom's here?
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