趣味英语：中国美眉如何幽默地拒绝外国男人

　　男：Can I buy you a drink?（我可以为你买一杯饮料吗？）
　　女：Actually I'd rather have the money.（不必，我很有钱。）
　　男：Can I have your name?（直译：我能有你的名字吗？）
　　女：Why? Don't you already have one? （为什么？你不是已经有一个了吗？）
　　男：I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.（我是摄影师。我一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。）
　　女：I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.（我是整形外科医生。我也一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。）
　　男：Is this seat empty?（直译：这个座位是空的吧？）
　　女：Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.（是的，如果你坐下，我的座位就是空的。）
　　男：Haven't I seen you some place before?（我好象以前在什么地方见过你？）
　　女：Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.（是的。这就是为什么我不再去那个地方的原因。）
　　男：Will you go out with me this Saturday?（这个星期六你想跟我出去吗？）
　　女：Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.（抱歉。这个周末我头疼。）
　　男：I think I could make you very happy.（我想我能让你非常快乐。）
　　女：Why? Are you leaving?（是吗？你是说你要离开？）

　　四减四等于几
　　One day, the teacher inquired of Peter:" How much is four minus four?" Peter was tongue-tied. The teacher got angry and said: "What a fool! You see, if I put four coins in your pocket, but there is a hole in your pocket and all of them leak out, now what is left in your pocket?" "The hole," replied Peter.
　　一天，老师问彼得：“4减4等于几？”彼得张口结舌答不上来。
　　老师生气地说：“真笨！你想，我要是往你口袋里放四个硬币，而你的口袋上有个窟窿，硬币全漏掉了，那么，你衣袋里还剩下什么？”
　　“窟窿，”彼得答道。

　　A Letter to a Girl Friend
　　One day a young man was writing a letter to his girl friend who lived just a few miles away in a nearby town. Among other things, he was telling her how much he loved her and how wonderful he thought she was. The more he wrote the more poetic he became. Finally, he said that in order to be with her he would suffer the greatest difficulties, he would face the greatest dangers that anyone could imagine. In fact, to spend only one minute with her, he would climb the highest mountain in the world, he would swim across the widest river, he would enter the deepest forest and with his bare hands fight against the fiercest animals.
　　He finished the letter, signed his name, and then suddenly remembered that he had forgotten to mention something quite important. So, in a postscript below his name, he added: "By the way I'll be over to see you on Wednesday night -- if it doesn't rain."
　　致女朋友的一封信
　　一天，一个青年男子给住在离他几英里远的镇上的女朋友写信。除写了其他的事情外，他告诉她他爱她有多深，他认为她有多好，他越写越富有诗意。最后，他写道，为了能和她呆在一起，他将克服最大的困难，他将面对任何人能够想像的最大的危险。实际上，为了能和她呆上一分钟，他将爬越世界上最高的山，他将游过最宽的河，他将赤手空拳进入最深的森林同最凶恶的野兽搏斗。
　　他写完了信，签上了名，突然，他想起忘了写一件挺重要的事。因此，他在信末签名后又补充道：“顺便说一下，我将在星期三晚上去看你--如果不下雨的话。” www.qpx6.com

　　Whose Son Is the Greatest
　　The mothers of four priests got together and were discussing their sons. "My son is a monsignor," said the first proud woman. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Monsignor.'"
　　The second mother went on, "My son is a bishop. When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Excellency.'"
　　"My son is a cardinal." continued the next one. "When he enters a room, people say, 'Hello, Your Eminence.'"
　　The fourth mother thought for a moment. "My son is six-foot-ten and weighs 300 pounds," she said, "When he enters a room, people say, 'Oh, my God.'"
　　谁的儿子最伟大
　　四个神职人员的母亲聚在一起谈论自己的儿子。“我儿子是个牧师，”第一个骄傲的母亲说，“当他走进一个房间时，人们会说，‘您好，牧师。”
　　第二个母亲接着说，“我儿子是个主教，当他走进一个房间时，人们会说，‘您好，主教阁下。”
　　“我儿子是红衣主教，”第三个母亲继续，“当他走进一个房间时，人们会说，‘您好，尊敬的红衣主教。”
　　第四个母亲想了一会儿，说：“我儿子身高6尺10吋，体重300磅，当他走进一个房间时，人们都说，‘哦，我的上帝！”

　　The Climate of New Zealand
　　Teacher: Matthew, what is the climate of New Zealand?
　　Matthew: Very Cold, sir.
　　Teacher: Wrong.
　　Matthew: But, sir! When they send us meat it always arrives frozen!
　　新西兰的气候
　　老师：马修，新西兰的气候怎么样？
　　马修：先生，那里的天气很冷。
　　老师：错了。
　　马修：可是，先生！从那儿运来的猪肉都冻得硬邦邦的。

　　Animal with Four Legs
　　Teacher: Betty, name two animals which have four legs.
　　Betty: Two hens.
　　四条腿的动物
　　老师：贝蒂，给我说出两个四条腿的动物。
　　贝蒂：两只母鸡。，趣味英语：中国美眉如何幽默地拒绝外国男人